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Review ß The Highly Sensitive Child: Helping Our Children Thrive When the World Overwhelms Them Version I have found other evidence that sensitive people are also not inherently shy or neurotic that is anxious and depressed All of these descriptors are secondary noninnate traits found in some sensitive people as well as in many who are not sensitiveWhen I made my reuest to interview sensitive people I was swamped with volunteers and finally spoke individually with forty men and women of all ages and walks of life for three hours each They really wanted to talk about this the term and why it meant so much to them the moment they heard it Many adults purchase The Highly Sensitive Person simply because they recognized themselves in the title and likewise you may have bought this book because you recognized your child in its title After discerning the many details of sensitivity from these interviews I was able to create a long uestionnaire about it and later a shorter one see pages and have since given these to thousands of individuals The percent or so who are highly sensitive usually immediately grasp the concept as describing them The nonsensitive percent or so truly do not get it and some answer no to every item I found the same results through a random phone survey Sensitive people really are differentSince then I have written and taught on the subject extensively and soon saw the need for a book on raising highly sensitive children There were too many sad stories from adults about their difficult childhoods in which well meaning parents caused tremendous pain because they did not know how to raise a sensitive child So I interviewed parents and children and from those talks developed a uestionnaire that was given to over a hundred parents of all types of children That survey when honed down to the uestions that best distinguish HSCs from non HSCs became the parent s uestionnaire at the end of the IntroductionWhat Is High Sensitivity Highly sensitive individuals are those born with a tendency to noticein their environment and deeply reflect on everything before acting as compared to those who notice less and act uickly and impulsively As a result sensitive people both children and adults tend to be empathic smart intuitive creative careful and conscientious they are aware of the effects of a misdeed and so are less likely to commit one They are alsoeasily overwhelmed by high volume or large uantities of input arriving at once They try to avoid this and thus seem to be shy or timid or party poopers When they cannot avoid overstimulation they seem easily upset and too sensitiveAlthough HSCs notice they do not necessarily have better eyes ears sense of smell or taste buds although some do report having at least one sense that is very keen Mainly their brains process informationthoroughly This processing is not just in the brain however since highly sensitive people children or adults have faster reflexes a reaction usually from the spinal cord areaffected by pain medications and stimulants and havereactive immune systems andallergies In a sense their entire body is designed to detect and understandprecisely whatever comes inHow HSCs Sort OrangesWhen I was little my father liked to take our family to visit factories where he would talk the managers into taking us on a tour The steel mills and glass manufacturers overwhelmed me of course because I was highly sensitive They were too loud hot and fiery and I would cry so that I dreaded these trips My nonsensitive family members on the other hand were annoyed by my tour stopping behaviors But I liked one tour the orange packing plant I liked the ingenious invention that moved the oranges down a shaking conveyer belt until they fell into one of three sized slots small medium or largeI now use that experience as a way to describe the brains of HSCs Instead of having three slots for processing what comes down the conveyer belt to them they have fifteen slots for making very fine distinctions And all goes well until too many oranges come down the belt at once Then you have a huge jam upSo of course HSCs probably will not like the loud mariachi band in the Mexican restaurant noisy birthday parties playing fast paced team sports or everyone watching while they give an answer in class But if you need a guitar tuned a clever idea for party favors a witty play on words or to win a game like chess that reuires anticipating conseuences or noticing subtle differences your HSC is the one to have aroundIs It All or None Can your child be just a little sensitive Some researchers say you either have the trait or you do not others say it is a continuum My own research says both that is some HSCs seemsensitive than others probably because there are so many ways that a child s environment can increase or decrease how much sensitivity is expressed But if it were a true continuum like height or weight most people would be in the middle In fact the distribution of highly sensitive people islike a flat line perhaps even with a fewpeople at either endInside the Highly Sensitive ChildLet s go farther inside the mind of your HSC Yes he notices but he may have a specialty Some tune in to social cues mainly noticing moods expressions or relationships Some HSCs mainly notice the natural world such as changes in the weather or the ualities of plants or they seem to have an uncanny ability to communicate with animals Some express subtle concepts or the humorous and ir.

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Review ß The Highly Sensitive Child: Helping Our Children Thrive When the World Overwhelms Them Chapter OneSensitivityA Better Light on Shy and Fussy ChildrenThis chapter helps you decide if you have a highly sensitive child and explores the trait thoroughly It also providesknowledge about all of your child s inherited temperament traits Our goal will be to free you of any misconceptions you may have heard about sensitive children Finally we will distinguish high sensitivity from actual disorders which it is not Well if he were my child he d eat what was set before himYour daughter is so uiet have you considered seeing a doctor about that He is so mature so wise for his age But he seems to think too much Don t you worry that he isn thappy and carefree Jodie s feelings are so easily hurt And she cries for other kids too when they are teased or hurt And during the sad parts of stories We don t know what to do for herIn my kindergarten class everyone participates in group time but your son refuses Is he this stubborn at home Are these sorts of comments familiar to you They are to the parents I interviewed for this book They had heard all sorts of well intentioned comments like these from in laws teachers other parents and even mental health professionals If you ve received such comments it is almost surely a sign that you are the parent of a highly sensitive child HSC And of course they are troubling because you re hearing that something is odd or wrong with your child yet you find your child marvelously aware caring and sensitive Further you know that if you followed the well intentioned advice like forcing your child to eat foods he dislikes socialize when he does not feel like it or taking him to a psychiatrist your child would suffer On the other hand if you follow the lead of your child he thrives Yet the comments keep coming so you wonder if you re a bad parent and if your child s behavior is your fault I have heard this same story over and overThe Operating Manual for Your ChildNo wonder you worry that you may be doing something wrong You have no one to help you You have probably noticed that most parenting books focus on problem behaviors restlessness distractibility wildness and aggression Your child is probably anything but a problem in these senses You re struggling with issues that the books don t talk about so much eating problems shyness nightmares worrying and intense emotions that are not directed so much at others as they are simply outbursts The usual advice that you eliminate unwanted behaviors through conseuences punishment often does not work your child seems crushed by punishment or even criticismIn this book you will receive advice but only for sensitive children and from parents of sensitive children myself included plus specialists in this trait And our first advice is not to believe people when they imply there is something wrong with your child and do not let your child believe it either Nor are your child s differences your fault Of course parenting can always be improved and this book will improve youthan others because again it is written entirely with your different child in mind But forget the idea that the problem is some basic flaw in parent or childDiscovering High SensitivityAccording to my own scientific research and professional experience as well as that of many others who have studied this trait under different less accurate labels your child has a normal variation in innate human temperament She is one of the to percent born highly sensitive far too many for them all to be abnormal Further the same percentage of sensitive individuals is found in every species that has been studied as far as I know With evolution behind it there must be a good reason for the trait s presence We will get to that in a moment but first a little bit about this discoveryI began studying high sensitivity in after another psychologist commented to me that I was highly sensitive I was curious personally not planning to write a book or even to try to tell anyone about my findings In my community and the university where I was teaching I merely asked to interview people who were highly sensitive to physical or emotionally evocative stimuli or highly introverted At first I thought sensitivity might really be the same as introversion which is the tendency to prefer to have one or two close friends with whom one can talk deeply and not to be in large groups or meet strangers Extroverts on the other hand like large gatherings have many friends but usually talk less intimately with them and enjoy meeting new people It turned out that introversion was not the same as high sensitivity Although percent of highly sensitive people HSP are introverts a tendency that is probably part of their strategy to reduce stimulation percent are extroverts So I knew I had uncovered something newWhy would a highly sensitive person be extroverted According to my interviews they were often raised in close loving communities in one case even a commune For them groups of people were familiar and meant safety Others seemed to have been trained to be outgoing by their families it was imperative and as good HSPs they tried to do what was expected of them One woman recalled the day and hour she decided to become an extrovert She had lost her best and only friend and decided then and there not to depend any on having just one friendSince discovering that the trait of sensitivity is not the same as intro. Aquitaines. Voyages immobiles be to free you of any misconceptions you may have heard about sensitive children Finally we will distinguish high sensitivity from actual disorders which it is not Well if he were my child he d eat what was set Dictionnaire gascon-français. le parler du bassin d'arcachon et de ses environs before himYour daughter is so uiet have you considered seeing a doctor about that He is so mature so wise for his age But he seems to think too much Don t you worry that he isn thappy and carefree Jodie s feelings are so easily hurt And she cries for other kids too when they are teased or hurt And during the sad parts of stories We don t know what to do for herIn my kindergarten class everyone participates in group time Monuments aux morts de la Grande Guerre dans les Landes but your son refuses Is he this stubborn at home Are these sorts of comments familiar to you They are to the parents I interviewed for this Pionnier à vie book They had heard all sorts of well intentioned comments like these from in laws teachers other parents and even mental health professionals If you ve received such comments it is almost surely a sign that you are the parent of a highly sensitive child HSC And of course they are troubling Nos fleurs d'Aquitaine : dans la langue, la sorcellerie et la médecine gasconnes (lexique français-gascon) because you re hearing that something is odd or wrong with your child yet you find your child marvelously aware caring and sensitive Further you know that if you followed the well intentioned advice like forcing your child to eat foods he dislikes socialize when he does not feel like it or taking him to a psychiatrist your child would suffer On the other hand if you follow the lead of your child he thrives Yet the comments keep coming so you wonder if you re a Petite grammaire de l'obscene, églises du duche d'aquitaine xieme et xiieme bad parent and if your child s Dictionnaire Français - Gascon behavior is your fault I have heard this same story over and overThe Operating Manual for Your ChildNo wonder you worry that you may Le monument aux Girondins : les quatre saisons be doing something wrong You have no one to help you You have probably noticed that most parenting Immobilier Côte Aquitaine : Gironde, Landes, Pays basque books focus on problem Guide Franck du cyclotourisme. Aquitaine behaviors restlessness distractibility wildness and aggression Your child is probably anything L'Aquitaine a Paris, Mode d'Emploi but a problem in these senses You re struggling with issues that the Nos Bêtes d'Aquitaine dans la langue, l'histoire et le légendaire gascons books don t talk about so much eating problems shyness nightmares worrying and intense emotions that are not directed so much at others as they are simply outbursts The usual advice that you eliminate unwanted Carte marine : Courants des marées, côte ouest France behaviors through conseuences punishment often does not work your child seems crushed Beautés de la France : L'Aquitaine by punishment or even criticismIn this Poitou-Charentes, Aquitaine : 29 itinéraires, 300 sites book you will receive advice l' Aquitaine - Le Périgord, Le Quercy aujourd'hui but only for sensitive children and from parents of sensitive children myself included plus specialists in this trait And our first advice is not to Michelin Atlantic coast : Poitou-Aquitaine the Basque country believe people when they imply there is something wrong with your child and do not let your child D'Allemagne outre-Pyrénées en bateau et sur les routes d'Aquitaine : Choses vues, rêvées et lues par Christian August Fischer vers 1800 believe it either Nor are your child s differences your fault Of course parenting can always Littoral Aquitaine. Le guide be improved and this Guide du Routard Ardèche Drôme 2018/19: (Auvergne, Rhône, Alpes) book will improve youthan others Le Génie de l'Ardèche because again it is written entirely with your different child in mind But forget the idea that the problem is some Plantes médicinales : Pour se soigner en Ardèche et ailleurs basic flaw in parent or childDiscovering High SensitivityAccording to my own scientific research and professional experience as well as that of many others who have studied this trait under different less accurate labels your child has a normal variation in innate human temperament She is one of the to percent Vallée du Rhône : Lyonnais, Velay, Ardèche born highly sensitive far too many for them all to QUE FAIRE PNR MONTS ARDECHE 06 be abnormal Further the same percentage of sensitive individuals is found in every species that has Vivarais-Ardèche been studied as far as I know With evolution Le guide de l'Ardèche behind it there must Rhône-Alpes : Diois, Baronnies, Gorges de l'Ardèche 2000 be a good reason for the trait s presence We will get to that in a moment DECOUVERTE GEOLOGIQUE DE L'ARDECHE ET DE LA DROME but first a little Ardèche méridionale bit about this discoveryI L'Ardeche, Tout Simplement began studying high sensitivity in after another psychologist commented to me that I was highly sensitive I was curious personally not planning to write a Des gorges de l'Ardèche à la Margeride book or even to try to tell anyone about my findings In my community and the university where I was teaching I merely asked to interview people who were highly sensitive to physical or emotionally evocative stimuli or highly introverted At first I thought sensitivity might really Au coeur des Monts d'Ardèche : Le GRP de la Haute Cévenne d'Ardèche be the same as introversion which is the tendency to prefer to have one or two close friends with whom one can talk deeply and not to La mémoire de l'Ardèche : Langue, enseignement, conscription, religion, santé, élections be in large groups or meet strangers Extroverts on the other hand like large gatherings have many friends Rouergue - Cévennes -Langedoc ( Aveyron,Ardèche,Lozère,Gard,Hérault) but usually talk less intimately with them and enjoy meeting new people It turned out that introversion was not the same as high sensitivity Although percent of highly sensitive people HSP are introverts a tendency that is probably part of their strategy to reduce stimulation percent are extroverts So I knew I had uncovered something newWhy would a highly sensitive person Aquarelles en Ardèche be extroverted According to my interviews they were often raised in close loving communities in one case even a commune For them groups of people were familiar and meant safety Others seemed to have Gr 4, 43, 44 : des gorges de l'ardeche a la margeride... been trained to Michelin Der Grüne Reiseführer: Rhonetal, Ardèche, Lyon be outgoing Carnet de voyage en Ardèche by their families it was imperative and as good HSPs they tried to do what was expected of them One woman recalled the day and hour she decided to Le plateau ardéchois become an extrovert She had lost her Ardèche, Drôme best and only friend and decided then and there not to depend any on having just one friendSince discovering that the trait of sensitivity is not the same as intro.

Summary À PDF, DOC, TXT, eBook or Kindle ePUB free ´ Elaine N Aron Ph.D.

Review ß The Highly Sensitive Child: Helping Our Children Thrive When the World Overwhelms Them Onic And some are mainly vigilant in new surroundings while others are mainly bothered by a change in the familiar Still in all cases they are noticingYour HSC is also thinkingthan other kids about what she has noticed Again there is always variation She may be pondering and asking you uestions about social dilemmas why you did what you did why one kid teased another or larger social issues Another HSC might be trying to solve difficult math or logic puzzles or worrying about what would happen if or making up stories or imagining their cat s thoughts All kids do these things but HSCs do themThe HSCs reflecting on what s come in particularly whatever they have seen or heard may be uite conscious and obvious as when they ask fortime to decide something You have probably noticed that trying to get an HSC to decide uickly is like trying to walk a male dog uickly past fire hydrants But often HSCs processing is entirely unconscious as when they just intuitively sense what is going on with you Indeed intuition might be defined as knowing something without knowing how you know it and sensitive people are generally highly intuitiveThe processing may be rapid as when a child instantly knows something s up or you changed my sheets when other children would not notice Or it may be slow as when HSCs think about something for hours then announce some startling insightFinally as a result of taking inand processing itcompletely if the situation is creating an emotional response and all situations do to some extent your HSC is going to feel stronger emotions Sometimes it s intense love awe or joy But because all children are dealing with new stressful situations every day HSCs will also have to feel fear anger and sadness and feel theseintensely than other childrenBecause of these strong feelings and deep thoughts most HSCs are unusually empathic So they sufferwhen others suffer and become interested early in social justice They are also brilliant interpreters of what is happening in anything or anyone that cannot speak plants animals organs in bodies babies those not speaking the sensitive person s language and the very elderly when they suffer from dementia They tend to have rich inner lives And again HSCs are conscientious for their age they can imagine for themselves or understand when you say what if everybody did that They also tend to seek the meaning of their lives very earlyMind you HSCs are not saints In particular with a few bad experiences they arelikely than others to become shy fearful or depressed But with a little gentle guidance they are exceptionally creative cooperative and kind except when overwhelmed And whatever they are doing or not doing HSCs do stand out even though they are not problems in the usual senseLong before I knew I was raising a highly sensitive child I just knew my son was different He was aware incredibly creative conscientious cautious in new situations easily hurt by his peers not fond of rough and tumble play or sports and emotionally intense He was hard to raise in some ways easy in others and always stood out even if only as the kid who was not joining in So I developed the motto that I shared with you in the Introduction If you want to have an exceptional child you must be willing to have an exceptional child The bestselling author and psychologist whose books have topped copies in print now addresses the trait of high sensitivity in childrenand offers a breakthrough parenting guidebook for highly sensitive children and their caregiversWith the publication of The Highly Sensitive Person Elaine Aron became the first person to identify the inborn trait of high sensitivity and to show how it affects the lives of those who possess it Up to percent of the population is born highly sensitive and now in The Highly Sensitive Child Aron shifts her focus to highly sensitive children who share the same characteristics as highly sensitive adults and thus face uniue challenges as they grow up Rooted in Arons years of experience as a psychotherapist and her original research on child temperament The Highly Sensitive Child shows how HSCs are born deeply reflective sensitive to the subtle and easily overwhelmed These ualities can make for smart conscientious creative children but with the wrong parenting or schooling they can become unusually shy or timid or begin acting out Few parents and teachers understand where this behavior comes fromand as a result HSCs are often mislabeled as overly inhibited fearful or fussyor classified as problem children and in some cases misdiagnosed with disorders such as Attention Deficit Disorder But raised with proper understanding and care HSCs are noprone to these problems than nonsensitive children and can grow up to be happy healthy well adjusted adults In this pioneering work parents will find helpful self tests and case studies to help them understand their HSC along with thorough advice on The challenges of raising an highly sensitive child The four keys to successfully parenting an HSC How to soothe highly sensitive infants Helping sensitive children survive in a not so sensitive world Making school and friendships enjoyableWith chapters addressing the needs of specific age groups from newborns through teensThe Highly Sensitive Child delivers warmhearted timely information for parents teachers and the sensitive children in their lives.

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  • Format Kindle
  • 368
  • The Highly Sensitive Child: Helping Our Children Thrive When the World Overwhelms Them
  • Elaine N Aron Ph.D.
  • Anglais
  • 20 July 2020
  • 0767908724